Mediation Alternative with Steven Spence

What Happens in Domestic Mediation?

Each separation or divorce is one-of-a-kind, just like marriage. During the marriage a couple works together on ways to solve family issues. When the marriage ends, by separation or by divorce, that "working together" is harder, and there are new issues facing the parties.

In the past, solving family issues often meant going to "outsiders" for help. Each spouse would hire a lawyer, the lawyer would write legal documents listing what each spouse wanted until, maybe, the spouses could agree. Sometimes the spouse couldn't afford a lawyer. And sometimes a family member, a friend, or clergy would help the spouses. Or sometimes the spouses didn't have a trusted third person willing to help them.

Today there is a different way of dealing with the issues and problems that come with separation and divorce. It's called Mediation. Mediation isn't marriage counseling--that is for couples who want to get back together again. Mediation is a way for you and your spouse to continue working together, to solve the new issues that come with separation.

Mediation works in the way that's best for your family. Usually, the mediator meets with you both, at the same time. Sometimes there are separate meetings too--whatever works best in your one-of-a-kind family situation. You each have an idea of what problems or issues need to be solved, but your ideas may be different. The mediator helps you find the issues on which you already agree, then works with you and your spouse for the best solution to the others.